LGBTQIA+ identities

LGBTQIA+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning (one’s sexual or gender identity), intersex, and asexual/aromantic/agender) young people may be figuring out lots of things, including about sexuality and/or gender identity and gender expression.

Definitions

These are some of the identities within and outside of LGBTQIA+ communities. We acknowledge that there are many distinct identities within the spectrum of sexuality and gender, and different experiences for people with innate variations of sex characteristics. Language used within LGBTQIA+ communities is constantly evolving and you may use different definitions to the ones below.

• Asexual or aromantic: When you have no or less sexual attraction, or no or less romantic attraction to others.
• Bi/Bisexual: When you are attracted to people of the same gender and other genders. Everyone’s experience is a little different, and bi/bisexual doesn’t necessarily mean being attracted to only two genders.
• Gay/homosexual: Someone who is romantically or sexually attracted to the same sex or gender.
• Intersex (or innate variations of sex characteristics): Intersex describes people who have intersex traits or characteristics that do not fit social or medical norms for male or female bodies. People with variations of sex characteristics have a diversity of bodies and identities.
• Lesbian: A woman or non-binary person who is romantically or sexually attracted to women.
• Non-binary: When you do not identify as exclusively male or female. Someone who is non-binary might feel like a mix of genders or no gender at all.
• Queer: This word was used as a slur to describe LGBTQIA+ people. In recent decades, the word is now used by many LGBTQIA+ people in a positive way to describe a wide range of LGBTQIA+ identities. While some LGBTQIA+ people wear the label proudly, others may find the word offensive due to the historical use.
• Straight/heterosexual: You are only romantically or sexually attracted to men if you are a woman, or women if you are a man.
• Trans/Transgender: Your gender identity does not correspond with your sex registered or assigned at birth.
• + or plus: This shows that people may identify with many different labels and identities that are not mentioned in the LGBTQIA+ acronym.

More definitions are available on the Kids Helpline website.

Figuring out your identity

Figuring out your identity can be tricky for many young people. Go easy on yourself. There is no time limit to figuring out how you identify or pressure to openly identify, and your identity can change over time.

Many young people who are figuring it out might feel ‘different’ from others around them. What you are going through is completely normal and lots of people around you may also be going through the same thing.

It can help to read about other people’s experiences, and know you are not alone in how you feel.

Sexuality

Sexuality is about who you feel romantic and sexual attraction towards. Everybody's sexuality is different and deeply personal.

It’s important to know that it’s normal to be attracted to people of any gender or not feel attraction at all.

There are many different preferences when we talk about sexuality. You may be attracted to one gender only, or be attracted to a diversity of people regardless of sex or gender, with a lot of different preferences in-between.

Understanding your sexuality can be a difficult process and, for some people, can take many years. During this time, you might experiment or have thoughts about being with someone of a certain gender, but that doesn’t necessarily define your sexuality.

Gender identity

Gender identity is different to your sexuality. Gender is your own concept of who you are and can show up in various ways, including behaviour and physical appearance. Many people identify as either male or female while it is normal for others to see their gender as a blend of these categories or as neither.

Gender expression

Gender expression is about how you express your gender identity. Your gender may be that you are a woman, but that doesn’t mean you need to dress or behave in any particular way.

Sex characteristics and intersex

Intersex is a descriptive term for a diverse population of people who have intersex traits or characteristics that do not fit medical norms for male or female bodies. People with variations of sex characteristics have diverse bodies and identities, including a wide spectrum of variations to genitals, hormones, chromosomes and/or reproductive organs.

Some umbrella terms used to describe being born with variations of sex characteristics are intersex, or Differences/ Disorders of Sex Development (DSD).

Being intersex or having innate variations of sex characteristics is normal, and is different to your sexuality and gender identity.
The Reach Out website can help you better understand sex, sexuality and gender.

Coming out

Coming out and telling others how you define yourself—e.g. that you have feelings towards people of the same gender—can be rewarding, but sometimes difficult. It’s healthier to be open about who you are, but you should only do so when it’s right for you.

Learn more about getting support.